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“Together Everyone Achieves More” = Team – Annon

A year ago, as part of a group, we decided to start a foundation with the idea of helping those close to us, the first donation was received on the 17th of April 2020, since then we have:

Raised over £7,842

We have received over 174 donations from 56 brothers

The smallest donation has been £5, the largest have been over £500.

We have 15-20 brothers contributing on a regular basis.

Board contribution accounts for 21%.

The has allowed us to give 20 gifts to men in times of need, and 3 promise to pay gifts at 0% interest.

The best thing is we are just getting started.

 In this post, I will share why we started the foundation and the lessons learnt so far. 

In the month of April 2020, a group of us decided to push an idea of starting a foundation. It was an idea that had been floating around for years but no action had taken place.  At the time of writing this piece, I can proudly say that we have raised over £7,842 and the money has been used to support brothers who are going through tough times. I currently work with a board of 10, to help raise and administer funds to support people in times of need. 

For the last 4 years, I’ve had the honour of being mentored by Lord Michael Hastings who has personally helped me navigate in both my personal, professional and private life. From a career perspective, he has invited me to places that I would otherwise have no access to such as the House of Lords, and to major global events such as One Young World and major Universities in the United States. He has also helped with work issues such as managing difficult stakeholders and helping me prepare for job interviews. From a personal perspective in times where I have slipped and disappointed many of the people around me, he never gave up on me. I’ve been fortunate to have his mentorship. It is deeper than mentorship – we are truly friends too.

Despite all of his work commitments, he personally leads and supports over 190 young people – I’m never sure how he finds the time to do so. He has created a network known as the MOP

(Men of Purpose). It is a group of young black professionals all at different paths in life; some just out of jail and others are directors of investment firms or business owners; all on the journey of becoming the best versions of themselves and giving back to their communities. The different backgrounds create a unique environment where we call all learn from each other. 

The part that I have found most fascinating is how he supports others. Although he will never disclose the amount I’m sure he has financially given over £100,000. This has been used to help some with a family crisis, theatre school, wedding events, condolence gifts but most importantly during times of hardships and often many times over.

Our communities need more people like Lord Hastings. And I’m sure from all of the brothers he mentors we will see a few rising up and leading with open hearts and thoughtful minds.

But help is required now and we can’t wait until we are in our 60s to start giving back.

As one of the oldest in the group, I was privileged to be present for a discussion on what we could achieve if we’d come together to support and help each other in times of need. The work Michael has done has been amazing but it would be in vain should it stop when he is no longer with us (hopefully 10000 years from now !) Some believed it was a great idea, some were not too sure, which I totally understand and when it comes to money, suspicion can be at an all-time high!

I thought the idea was amazing and something definitely needed. I’m at a point in my life where I know I can help, so I felt it was unfair for me to sit back while Michael does all the work. If we all come together, a heavy load becomes lighter. So I started working with another brother in the group, Segun who is finance director, to formulate the idea, of developing a vehicle to support brothers in times of hardship.

I would love to say that we started straight away but the reality is that I initially procrastinated for over a year. My mind developed numerous negative thoughts as to why it would not work. I feel within our community there is a general lack of trust, and feeling that we will mess up and worse steal money. I knew that wouldn’t be the case here, and if we proved it could work on a smaller scale we could only do greater things. The time for talking was over. Let’s put our money where our mouth is.

In the midst of the Coronavirus, I decided to share the idea with the group and in hindsight, this wasn’t the best time, as many of the brothers had been furloughed over even made redundant, but it all served as the perfect time. The pandemic heightened the importance of helping each other. I decided to put the idea out and see what happens. I was overwhelmed with positive feedback, and words of encouragement and it served as affirmation that it would work. 

But life tried to throw a spanner in the works a couple of days after I announced it to the group. I was told that the company I was working with were letting go of all contractors. In previous years I would have dropped the foundation work to resolve my own issues, but I now knew that this was just a distraction and kept focused on my vision for the foundation. And the work situation eventually resolved itself. And then shortly after we all witnessed the horrific murder of George Floyd, this motivated me to work on this harder, we should protest for change, but we should also build the change we wish to see. Our level of sacrifice has to exceed our anger. 

The first hurdle was getting a board together, we set a deadline and decided to move forward with the 10 people who offered a commitment to the project. Due to banks being closed we decided to use my personal account and we decided to focused on raising funds internally first as we wanted to focus on supporting the members of the group. I was shocked by the outpouring of support and contributions starting rolling in. 

Shortly after, requests started coming through. Being in this position has made me realise that we take so many things for granted. No matter how bad you think you may have it, the chances are there is someone that would trade places with you in a heartbeat. It has also made me realise money can’t solve everything, in most cases, the situations can’t just be solved with money, the board have had to work with the men over a long period of time. It has also caused a lot of internal growth; I can no longer be as wasteful with the resources I have, it’s taken my empathy level to new heights. It has shown me the importance of vision, sharing that vision with others, starting internal systems and processes.

Now the world is starting to open up a little, we have opened a community account and really trying to get the ball rolling, the fund will initially support the Men Of Purpose group, but in time, we hope a community impact and eventually a world impact. But starting small we are learning and perfecting the process so that when we are operating on a world scale we will be ready.

I would encourage you all to find people you trust and build together – it can be family or friends. In most cases, we are all the help we need.

I was personally inspired by Jude and Rodney who co-created the Cornerstone Partners (https://cornerstonepartners.co.uk/about-cornerstone/) and raised a £1m to invest in black and diverse businesses.

There is no reason why you and a couple of friends can’t invest in a property together and build your own foundation based on growing assets. What we have long thought was impossible and difficult is achievable….. if we would just come together, plan, and strive to make it work. 

You’re the architect of life

I’ve previously spoken about the superpowers of growing up in the “ends”. I’m very proud of my upbringing, and the community I grew up in, where many see disadvantages I see resilience and ingenuity. My community played a large part in shaping me into the man I am, for the most part, it has been positive.

However I’m not blind to the negative impacts caused by the “ends” mentality that so many of us embrace, and I would be remiss if I didn’t touch on the lies the ends taught us. We were lied to, and the cycle will continue if we don’t recognise it and try to change things. These lies have taken lives, started postcode wars, jailed some of us, but the worst crime of all it’s robbed many of their full potential.

In this post, I will speak on some of the lies that the ‘ends’ taught us. My hope is that it will challenge the way you think about things moving forward.

9 to 5 means you’re a loser

As much as my parents promoted becoming a doctor, lawyer or engineer, I grew up thinking that there were only 3 ways to make it out: sports, drugs or entertainment.  Often 9-5 is seen in a negative light. Working will always be a way to change your family’s fortune. Working a 9-5 should never be frowned upon but always respected. There would be no Jeff Bezos without his parent’s investments which were accumulated via 9 – 5 professions. I’ve met so many guys on the roads that could have successful careers if they transitioned to the corporate world. Am I saying it is easy? No, but is building a trap line easy NO! There is no reason why a drug dealer cannot become a successful recruitment consultant, you can make just as much without the fear of jail time and other occupation hazards that come with selling drugs. and there is no limit to what you can do, whatever talent or skill you have can be leveraged to make a career out of it. Don’t let the ends trick into thinking 9-5 isn’t cool.

Seeing my brother as an enemy

In my younger years, I was automatically hostile to anyone that I didn’t know, rather than seeing a stranger as a potential friend they were automatically viewed as an enemy. This is a low-frequency mindset. Just because someone lives in a different area than you do, or has different views from you, doesn’t make them your enemy. Plus we are more alike than we are different. I was definitely one of the guys screaming no new friends, but some of my greatest friendships have come from people I have met in my recent years. Furthermore, some of the friends that were there from the start showed their true colours as time went on. Give people a chance, even if it is only brief.

Trauma is normalised

I’ve had all types of weapons pulled out on me, I’ve witnessed close friends become drug addicts, and lost loved ones to meaningless violence, and I was someone that was trying to avoid drama. Unfortunately living in the ends means that you have most likely experienced or witnessed some traumatic events. The problem is we have normalised these traumatic experiences and as much as we may believe we are cool, they are affecting our lives and relationship. I’m paranoid about people knowing where I live, I randomly shed tears or get angry over losing certain friends, the moment I enter any house party or event I’m evaluating and watching everyone. I park my car a certain way in case we need to make a quick exit.  

Therapy is often frowned upon, but so many of us could benefit from it. We need to unload some of these issues that we have been carrying. We have been raised to keep silent and bottle it all in, but this will blow us up if we don’t deal with it. I know people that have been sectioned because of demons from their past, I have witnessed people lash out at family members because they couldn’t handle everything that they were dealing with. At the bare minimum find safe people you can talk to.

Better to be ignorant than smart

A close family friend had all of the intellectual tools to be almost anything he wanted, he was naturally gifted especially at maths, but the ends didn’t respect him for that, they respected him for his street cred, so he focused more on that. Now we all wonder what he could have been. The guys that we were calling geeks are the boss now, and the majority of “bad boys” have fallen off. Being ignorant may seem cool during your youth, but you will have a future of regret.

Pride at the cost of your future

A childhood friend was attached by some people that he had issues with, physically he was okay he had a couple of bruises and some minor cuts but his pride was wounded, he couldn’t let it slide. He found the people and got his revenge but is now serving life in prison. We hear stories like this all the time, but we never ask the question was it worth it? The same guys that will call you a punk or a coward for not riding out will be the same ones calling you dumb when you’re locked up. My pride is not at the point where I can let everything just go, but it’s not at the point where I’m going to throw away my future because of people’s opinion of me. Don’t let pride cost you your future.

Blow Money Fast – Look the part, rather than being the part

In my early 20s, I managed to save £10,00 in cash. That money that I struggled to save went towards a car, some jewellery and designer clothes. The car broke down, I lost one of the rings and I couldn’t tell you where the clothes are now. That money could have been used as a down payment for a house, and even invested in the stock market or even Bitcoin. I had a friend telling me to invest around those times too. But like many others, I was focused on looking the part rather than being the part. We all know someone spending more than they make, it’s just a downward spiral, stay down until you come up. This isn’t just an issue in the ends, we have all heard of the saying keeping up with the Joneses. But I passionate about changing the narrative in my community, and this is one of the issues really affecting us.

We don’t need to subscribe to the lies we have taught, but we need to be conscious of them so we can break them,

Whether you are trying to climb up the corporate ladder or trying to succeed in the entrepreneurial world, you need to develop a path/system/rules to guide you on that journey. 

As your career continues to progress along the way, you will learn certain rules which guide you.

In this post, I will touch upon the work commandments that have supported me on my journey. 

1. Do more than you’re paid to do.

You need to develop the mindset of doing more than you’re paid to do. Firstly, it’s a mental exercise that prepares you for hard work. Secondly, it helps build a standard in you that puts you ahead of your peers if they are not doing the same. You’re likely to learn and develop faster than everyone else, and you will build a reputation for working hard which will lead to some opportunities that you wouldn’t otherwise have access too. When I started my career in recruitment the hours were 7 am to 9 pm, but we were only paid from 9 am to 5 pm. I hated most days but it built an attitude, doing more than I have been paid to do. I have carried this mindset to other positions and excelled because of it.

Some people try this for a month and then quit because they don’t get the result they wanted. But this commandment needs to become a lifestyle, only then will you get the benefit.

2. Never Gossip.

Growing up in “ends” I saw someone get slapped for spreading rumours about someone else, that taught me at an early age the seriousness of gossiping. 

I can’t proclaim to never have taken part but I try and make a conscious effort to avoid it as much as possible. There have been times where I’ve heard people talking negatively about me, I try my hardest to just ignore it and continue on my path. Remember, the people talking about you are probably jealous of the position you’re in or want something you’ve got.

I’ve worked in environments where gossiping was part of the culture. I purposely made an effort not to get involved. I do not agree with the idea of talking behind someone’s back. It’s also hard to trust a person that will talk behind your back and smile in your face. Avoiding gossip helps build character, it’s so easy to just partake, and you can sometimes be considered an outcast for not getting involved but eventually, your colleagues will respect it, and that integrity will speak volumes when you’re not present.

There are times where you may need to speak to someone to get something off your chest, in those instances find trusted advisors you can confide in.

3. Commit to purposeful lifelong learning.

Purposeful learning shouldn’t ever stop, and if it does it’s likely your earning potential will too. I think when people hear “learning,” they think of it in the traditional sense of a classroom but it doesn’t need to be that. It can be in the form of books, mentoring, YouTube videos, personal projects, online tutorials, etc. Lifelong learning allows you to master your craft, pick up new skill sets and better your life.

At the start of my career, I’d spend my weekends in the library, just reading and learning, and fortunately, all of that accumulated knowledge eventually paid dividends.

Find time to study and master your craft. Don’t wait for an opportunity to come before you get ready. Identify the person you want to be, then start doing the work now.

4. Always take the higher road.

There is a saying people will try and bring you to their level then beat you with experience. I’ve been provoked many times at work, but I remember telling myself you can’t let anyone make you take off your crown. By no means am I suggesting be silent while someone is being overly disrespectful, but at the same time do not throw away everything you have worked for over someone pointless.

Learn to embrace criticism, firstly assess if there is any truth to the comment. This requires you to be honest with yourself. If there is, then apply the relevant parts or make the necessary adjustments. If it’s not just disregarded the criticism. It’s not what someone says or does, it’s always how we respond. Once you understand that, no one will have power over you.

5. Never get complacent or develop a sense of entitlement.

At one point I got very complacent in both my attitude and work ethic, this led me making terrible choices in both my career and personal life. I had to remember that I used to dream of being in the position that I’m in right now. My life could have gone very different, I have to constantly remind myself that I’m blessed to be in the position I’m in, but understand that I still have much further to go. With this mindset I never get complacent.

Entitlement is such a damaging belief. I’ve witnessed people not progress in life because they are waiting for a hand-out. The reality is no one owes you anything. Once you remove expectations your life will be better. I hope and work towards the best, but I accept what life gives me.

6. Be consistent in all endeavours.

With consistency, you can have whatever you want. A lot of the time we quit because things don’t happen as fast as we like. But you have to learn to trust the process. Establish what you want, devise the systems to get there, and be diligent in your effort until you get the results you desire.

When I was searching for a contract my approach was to apply for 50 roles a day, every single day until I found a contract. By the time I got one, I had about 4 other offers. Because my consistency had paid off. Forget the results and fall in love with the process.

7. Avoid cheating, or claiming someone else works.

This shouldn’t need any expansion, every single time in my work and personal life that I’ve taken a shortcut or done something that I shouldn’t have, I’ve eventually paid the price. It’s never worth it. Your reputation can take years to build and can be destroyed in seconds.

I’ve never claimed someone else’s work, but I’ve had someone claim my work. They crumbled in the presentation because they didn’t know the details, they lost trust from senior management. Integrity is priceless and takes a long time to rebuild, do not compromise that.

8. Wins are trifling, focus on learning from your mistakes.

Over the years my approach to making mistakes has completely changed. Instead of punishing myself for making the mistake, I focus on what I can learn from that situation and make the necessary changes. There is nothing wrong with making mistakes as long as you’re willing to learn from it.

Celebrate the wins but never let it get to your head if you do you may invite arrogance and complacency into your life. Success is rarely yours, yes it’s down to your hard work, but luck plays a part. So always remain humble.

9. Master the art of saving.

Napoleon Hill once said, “if you can’t save the seed of greatness is not in you”. Although I don’t wholeheartedly agree I understand the concept. 

Saving allows you to have more control over your future. Because I had little savings when I first graduated, I took the first opportunity given to me, because I felt I needed the money. Had I had a safety net, I would have been more selective about the roles I applied for. I learnt very early it’s not how much you keep it’s all about how much you save.

Because of my savings I’ve been able to take advantage of some amazing opportunities, providing bridge loans to trusted friends. 

Lastly, saving provides assurance. I don’t need to compromise integrity for a payslip. I’m not at a point of financial freedom, but I have enough to not compromise myself for anyone.

10. Focus on building systems, rather than goals.

Do not spend too much time focusing on goals, focus on building systems for achieving those goals. 

Many people spend so much time focusing on the goals instead of devising systems to get there. I spend a little time establishing my north star goals, but once that is in place the majority of time is spent on building solutions to get there, and once that is done the greatest effort is on executions. 

From watching your habits, people should be able to see what your goals are.

Thanks for taking the time to read this. Let me know which commandments you agree/disagree with?

What would you add?

You’re the architect of your life.

Recently I went to watch the Blue Story movie, a modern-day love story with a street element. The movie is centred around two friends Timi and Marco, who due to conflicting postcodes become enemies. I thought the movie was amazing and personally connected with it on so many levels, I remember just playing football with friends, fast forward a couple of years we have problems just because we are from different areas. I remember the journeys to school navigating through some many different ends all of which have problems from each other. The postcode war has been going on long before me and will continue if we do nothing about it. I’ve seen friends gone to jail and the loss of lives over what a postcode?  We have to save us. The reality is before we get new stories, we need new role models.

In this post, I will explore why the perceived heroes in our communities need to change before anything progresses.

For a long time trap stars, bad boys, hustlers and gangsters have been the heroes and influencers in our community. Guys wanted to be like them and girls wanted to be with them. 

So naturally, as a young boy, I was heavily influenced by that lifestyle, you see the glamour of it and not the actual reality. At that age, they appeared to have all the money, the girls and the power. I couldn’t wait to start sending guys to the shop. They showed us the importance of loyalty, taught us how to move correctly, how to defend ourselves, and showed love to people they barely knew.

From them, I learned a lot which I still apply today: for example the importance of entrepreneurship. In year 7 I started selling sweets, getting to the point of making an average of £10-20 a day. I started doing events at university, starting a contracting business and e-commerce business. They taught me never to gossip, so I’ve always avoided the kitchen talks at work, which I’ve seen land a lot of people in trouble. I was exposed to real violence so a director shouting could never scare me, work deadlines are not real pressure to me. I was taught to always have a safety net, I put mine in index funds. I’ve watched them and thought about legal ways I could do the same. 

But from them, I have also had to unlearn a lot. I grew up thinking it was cool to be a ladies man, never really processing the way we are hurting our sisters. This is something I have only recently truly understood. In chasing money I have missed out on precious time with friends and family but also wasted on clothes and jewellery. In trying to take short cuts I almost lost my MSc degree.

The true reality of that road lifestyle doesn’t get spoken about enough – only a few make it out clean. The majority ends in three ways… 1. you realise you were not built for that life and go legit 2. dead 3. in jail. If we don’t help our communities this cycle will keep on repeating itself. 

Why did I look up to them? Because they defined “cool”, and were accessible. So if we want to break this cycle we have to reinvent what cool is, and try and be active in our communities.

In order to re-define cool, we need to carry ourselves knowing that there are people that will follow in our footsteps. Don’t get comfortable: we need to raise up and push on until we hit the highest heights possible in all areas of our lives. We need to step up, it’s not enough to be doing well, we need to be the best we can be. I’ve been guilty of getting complacent, I started doing okay and felt like I can chill. But I have realised now there is so much further I need to take it, and I promise you I will. 

I’ve seen a lot of us that start doing well, get that little corporate role or a business idea takes off, and instead of reaching back and helping others they want to disassociate themselves from the problem. That might be cool for them, but to me, the real value is in how many people you can put positively influence. Buying bottles in the club is not sharing my success.

We need to become the heroes our community needs and stop waiting for someone else to come and save us.

We need to engage with our community and help as many as we can. We can’t save everyone, but let’s do what we can. If you’re scared for your safety, do it through a charity (Chance UK, I’ve personally worked with them in the past) or with a friend. From my experience when people see you’re genuine they will welcome you with open arms. You might ask why should I even care, just think where you would be if you had the you that you are today or the you that you have the potential to be.

This year has taught me how many people are looking towards me. It wasn’t something I was really ever conscious of. But now that I am, I have got to show them the right way. I will make mistakes but I will also keep trying. The whole reason I wrote the £17,000 to 6 figures, wasn’t to stunt or flex, I wanted to show some of the youngsters in my area that we are not limited to what we have seen in our environment.

So if you want to change the stories, start by becoming one the heroes your community needs.

• Find a charity to support either with resources or time.
• Mentor someone at risk.
• Be accessible/ Visible in your community.
• Become the best you possible. People are watching you.
• Focus on the work that needs to be done, criticising rarely changes anything.

“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.” – Theodore Rossevelt

A maxim is considered a short statement expressing a truth or rule of conduct. Below are 30 Maxims I hold true at turning 30. 

Our culture needs more heroes, you owe it to yourself and the people to become the best you possible. Whether you know it or not, people are watching you. Do your best to lead them right.

Money doesn’t bring you happiness, I’m a position where I can get some (not everything) of the things I want. But there is no excitement in that. I spent my whole life thinking money would make me happy, now I’ve realised there is more pleasure in helping people around you.

Learn who is for you and cherish those relationships, I remember the days I would have like 20 guys outside my mums’ house. There are only a few still around. I wasted time helping people who didn’t deserve it and neglecting the ones that did.

Reading will change your life, try and read a book every month.

Don’t just focus on learning, there is a lot we need to unlearn too. For me, it was my attitude in relationships and my love of money.

Access to your energy is a privilege. Protect your energy at all costs.

Success isn’t just about hard work. Intelligence, environment, discipline, and luck all play a part. Instead of bragging just be thankful and never take for granted where you are.

No matter how dark things seem, there is always something to be thankful for. Try and always find the positives.

There are so many ways to make it, don’t believe anyone that tells you that this is the only way.

You don’t need to pray for much if God gives you health and discipline everything else you want will come. – Shuffz

There are some people around you that are waiting for you to fail, the moment you slip the will show themselves. Just remember who they are.

Running and gym are less about vanity and more about sanity at this point. They have become the way to manage stress. I might have crumbled this year if it wasn’t for them.

You can’t save everyone, it’s hard watching the people you care about go down the wrong path, but the reality is sometimes people need to learn the hard way. Before I help with my resources, you need to take my advice.

Learn from your mistakes, change your behaviour, try and make peace. But understand some may not be receptive.

The key is to become slightly better each day. Just do more tomorrow than you have today.

Your mistakes don’t define you. Don’t be so hard on yourself.

Nobody is all good and nobody is all bad, including yourself.

Invest in stocks, it’s not that hard, look into index funds.

Block out opinions both positive and negative, everyone has opinions on how you should be living your life. Don’t even bother arguing, but make sure you’re self-aware.

You need to let go of the grudges you hold. You do it so they can never hurt you again. But the reality is they don’t even deserve that space in your mind.

No one is around forever but memories can be, so make memories whenever you’re with your loved ones.

Some might be surprised when they see you, but you know you have had this planned out since year 7.

Judge no one, if it’s not positive don’t even speak.

Humans have a unique gift about speaking of your faults instead of resolving their own. Don’t be like that.

No one has control over your happiness apart from you, therefore you can always choose to be happy.

Understand you’re the architect of your life. Establish what you want, do the work then enjoy the results. Don’t take shortcuts, pay the cost.

It’s very rare to go from A to Z. A lot of people hide their Ls. Try and share yours so people know the true cost, but don’t ever cry if it’s used against you.

Only do things you’re passionate about. It makes the workload more bearable.

Stop comparing yourself to others, and don’t worry about these stupid checklists. Live your life. 

Enjoy life! You deserve it.

Which ones resonated with you? What are the maxims you live by? Share your thoughts down below.

We are coming towards the end of the year, so I felt like it was necessary to reflect on 2019 and document my thoughts on how this year has been for me and my plans for 2020. 

Family

The year couldn’t have started any worse, I was at work when my mum called me crying to tell me that my grandma had passed anyway. Over the last couple of years I have lost several  people close to me, my aunt to cancer, my uncle, murdered in Ghana. But losing my Grandma was the knockout blow. My whole mission was to make things easier for the family and I felt robbed of that. I had booked a flight for my mum to visit her because we knew she was unwell, but the thought of her death never entered my mind. My grandma passed before my mum could visit because instead of me just booking the flight, I was trying to find a decent price and it’s something I will forever regret. 

The following weeks made me proud to be Ghanian, I was in total shock of how my mum’s friends supported her. They were simply upholding traditions but it reinforced what friendship should be. We travelled to Ghana for her funeral, it was my first time being back home in 20 years. The send-off was amazing, my aunties and uncles really stepped up, but I also realised that it was now my time to step up.

In 2020 I want to spend a lot more time with the family, I have little cousins and nephews I need to try to see more, and hopefully be a better example for them. 

Finances 

In 2019 I’ve made more money than I ever have in my career, but I also spent a lot doing “guy guy.” I lost track of mission was and was moving like some “corporate trap star”. As I’m typing this I’m dropping my head in shame. I’ve had everything mapped out from the age of 14, but actually sticking to the plan when it’s in front of you is different. Been focusing in satisfying my short term needs rather than long term goals. Fortunately, I have come to my senses, and I’m being more financially responsible. The goal is to continue investing, but also manage my finances better. Flexing is nothing, changing lives for the people around is the real goal. 

In the ideal world I’m trying to manage my finances in the following way:

Invest – 50%

Spend – 20%

Save – 20%

Charity – 10%

I’m not there yet but this is the goal I’m trying to work towards.

Business

Business-wise it has been a disappointing year, working as an independent contractor has made me complacent. I started to neglect the businesses and skills I was working on. I started Lix Boutique with a friend but over the last couple of months I seriously neglected it. 

To me, the phrase; ‘you sow what you reap’ is so true, so I am investing more into my businesses, but also into this blog. The dream has always been to build a tech consultancy 2020 we are taking the steps to make this happen. 

Health

I’ve spent 8 months of this year being ill due to a lack of discipline. I’m disciplined in certain areas of my life but not across the board. I have a rare condition where I basically can’t eat anything with artificial sugar. But I also have the biggest sweet tooth in the world. This has caused me to suffer from ulcers for the majority of this year. This has affected work and personal life, sometimes people think I’m antisocial when the reality it was painful for me to talk. I’ve made a promise to myself to never let them come back, and I’m committed to that.

I’ve taken training and running more seriously, which has helped with my general well being. I would like to add a hobby to my routine, I’m considering basketball or maybe pick up boxing again. I’m also trying to eat right, working towards being a vegetarian but for now just an extra salad with my meals. 

Relationships

If you would have told me in my 20s that I would be 30 and single, I would have told you that you’re lying, but here we are. I made some mistakes, which I have learnt from and I’m just trying my best to move correctly from now on. 

The plan is to settle down in 2020, because it’s no longer about being that guy, I have to be a man now. Plus my mum is stressing me for grandkids.

Friends

I started this year trying to make peace with everyone I had a problem with in the past, I’m in a good space, I just can’t be asked to carry that negative energy. But the moment that was done, more problems came my way. Despite everything, I’m blessed to have good people around me which I’m trying to cherish more. I’ve also had some funny people who I’ve started to distance myself from.

Planning to try and just catch up with my people more in 2020, but I think the biggest lesson it to never let someone’s actions change you. I spent many years giving people the same energy they gave me, but I’m done with that.